Snow on the Crown

When we received the email announcing a snow day on Valentine’s Day, my first thought was, “Sweet! Free mid-term study day!” My second thought was, “Hike the Prescott Triple Crown.” Everyone says to think twice before you act, so I went with my later option. In defiance of the email’s forecast of “rapidly deteriorating weather… including freezing fog and high winds,” I set out on a single-day trip up Granite Mountain, Thumb Butte, and Spruce Mountain.

I arrived at Granite Mountain’s Metate trailhead when I normally arrive at campus for my 9:10a.m. class. After making my $5 donation to the good folks of the Forest Service, I trotted off onto Trail #261. Granite Mountain had a cloud sitting on it, and I caught my first glimpse of its red rocks only after I had turned onto its switchbacks. 

The whipping wind blew uphill, carrying me like a malformed sailboat with legs, until it deposited me above Granite Mountain’s eponymous climbing wall. The Ponderosa Pines had one inch of ice stuck to their wind-facing sides, and I quickly took my selfies under their canopies before scrambling back down. 

Now running face-first into the moving cloud, I was forced to take the trail one eyeball at a time. I’d shut the wind-facing eye to protect it from flying ice, and sub in the other eye when a switchback placed it in front of the sharp wind. If only I had a libero eyeball to assist in the rotation. 

Thumb Butte’s paved path was a quick reprieve from Granite Mountain’s muddy trail, but unfortunately (or perhaps luckily) the summit was closed due for Peregrine Falcon nesting. On my way down I encountered the only other hiker I would see that day, and he remarked “I thought I was the only one crazy enough to be out today!” He must not be a fan of this column, otherwise he’d know that bad choices are not limited by days, weather, or any form of good sense. 

I arrived at Spruce Mountain’s Groom Creek trailhead four hours after arriving at Metate, and I was not looking forward to the hike. Groom Creek Trail #307 was entirely under snow, and the wind was still throwing icy crystals into my face. But taking comfort in the forested path that would provide some protection from the elements, I set out on 307’s slow 3.5-mile climb. 

By the time I reached Spruce’s lookout tower the wind had accelerated enough to push through my gloves and start numbing my fingers. I rather enjoy having fingertips, so I took shelter in the only accessible location: an outhouse. Spruce’s standard issue Forest Service bathroom had snow on the floor, likely from the wind blowing it through the door gap, but was protected enough to hide in. 

I spent 30 minutes standing by the toilet opening and closing my hands, manually doing my heart’s job of pumping blood through my extremities. After a quick prayer and pep-talk I left the unconventional safehouse and raced back to my car, bringing all of my fingers with me.

After spending eight hours on the Triple Crown this Valentine’s Day, I can assure you that “freezing fog and high winds” was an accurate forecast. Next year, I think I’ll stay home and settle for chocolates. They’re a whole lot sweeter than ice.